Head Over Heels

I have never crushed on someone this hard for as long as I can remember.
Chances are, this whole web page is only going to be about him.
Because he is all I think about.
Just to get to know him.
Talk to him.
Laugh with him.
Have an intelligent conversation.
That would be amazing.

I saw him after school.
Walking past me.
I was going to say hi.
But I was on the phone.
He didn't see me anyway.

I wonder if he even has the slightest, tiniest clue,
If the thought ever entered his mind,
that I like him.
I'm a flirt, I flirt with a lot of people.
Maybe he figures that is just how I am.
But, that's only because he can't HEAR how loud my heart gets when I'm around him.
Thank God for deodorant, or he would just know that being around him makes me sweat.
Sometimes, when we do talk, its hard to look at him.
Will the look in my eyes give it away?
Stupid eyes. They never lie.
But, I have been pretending I don't like him since 8th grade.
Maybe, by now, my eyes just play along.

There are other things complicating this as well.
Not that it is not already complicated.
Since when am I self-conscious?
Seriously? Me? Care? Wow. Apocalypse.
It's what love does.